Hexed! Legend of the Grisly Greenis
by imsorryted
Summary: Neopian blogging sensation devotedslothminion has always been quick to deny the possibility of an intimate relationship between em and eir Master. But when Ted becomes trapped inside the body of a rubber duck it becomes much harder to maintain a professional relationship. Will Ted be able to wake up from the nightmare or will ey be fated to serve as Dr. Sloth's Bath Buddy forever?
1. Rise of the Pickle Peen

"How did I get here?" thought the little rubber duck. From what it could see, it seemed to be floating in a small lake surrounded by opaque white walls. No, wait. The water was too warm for that. The duck looked across to where an impressive waterfall fed into the body of water, creating ripples that rocked the duck gently as it bobbed about. Its jaw dropped, or at least it would have if it was able to move. This wasn't a lake. The gleam of metal confirmed it.

This was a giant bath.

A joyful whistling began to echo through the open cavern, and the duck watched with increasing trepidation as a green hand grasped the tap and turned it off. The whistling was replaced by a humming as a huge foot lowered itself into the water, closely followed by another. The sudden turbulence caught the duck off guard, and its viewpoint was tossed to and fro so it caught glimpses of the creature that was lowering itself into the bath. First, what looked like a giant pickle. But then, to the duck's horror, it realised that the "pickle" could only be one thing. The rest of the creature crashed into the water, sending the duck spinning out of control.

When it slowed, its eyes came rest on the face of the gargantuan creature. This was no giant. This was Dr. Sloth. The doctor leant forward and picked up the duck. The duck could hardly process what was happening. Dr. Sloth? Completely naked? In a bath?

"Hello, Duckie," said the doctor as he gave the duck a playful squeeze. He chuckled and placed the duck back in the water before sinking down into a more relaxed position. The wave carried the duck to the far end of the bath, much to its relief.

"How did I even get here? I'm not a rubber duck!" thought the duck. However, it couldn't remember exactly what it was before it had found itself in the bath. Unfortunately, the water was beginning to settle, and the duck now had a very clear view up the rest of the bath.

Sloth's eyes flicked towards the duck, a goofy smile on his face. Out of nowhere, the doctor's foot slammed into the duck's flank, sending it spinning once more. It hadn't even begun to slow down before it was struck by the other one. The duck tried to scream as it continued to be buffeted back and forth between the doctor's toes, but alas no sound was heard apart from the sloshing of the waves. As suddenly as it had begun, the onslaught ceased, and the duck was able to catch a few imaginary breaths.

At the other end of the bath, Sloth raised himself up - water cascading off his shoulders and well defined pecs - into a sitting position. He reached for a bar of soap that was sitting behind him, causing him to twist round and once more reveal that giant pickle peen in all its terrifying floppy glory. It was too much for the little duck.

"I HAVE TO GET OUT OF HERE," it screamed, or would have if it had the capability. Meanwhile, Sloth's body sank back down and he began lathering the soap around his arms. This would be the duck's only chance – it would have to try and find a way out while Dr. Sloth was still preoccupied.

The remaining turbulence had carried the duck around the front of the doctor's surprisingly smooth-skinned legs, and it now drifted calmly by the edge of the bath. It searched for any way it might be able to escape, but options are very limited when your body is made of fused rubber. Horrified, the duck then realised that it had passed round the crest of Sloth's foreleg and was now drifting under the arch of his leg – straight towards the floating monstrosity. Though the monster lurked, barely disturbing the surface, it was enough to send the duck into frenzy mode. It willed itself to move, with every polymer string of its inanimate body.

Miraculously, the duck managed to change course. Floating back around the doctor's thigh, relief overwhelmed the little duck. Its surroundings began to darken, and soap suds fell like flower blossom from Sloth's armpits, but the duck didn't mind. It was simply glad to be out of the danger zone, with a mass of buttocks and internal organs between it and the pickle peen.

Water splashed from up high as the doctor washed the last of the suds from his upper body. He leant forward, letting a bit more light into the canyon. The duck was now able to fully appreciate the beauty of the body that trapped it here. Light bounced off the curvature of Sloth's back as shining rivulets ran down towards the water. Though the doctor's anus was well below the surface, his impressive buttocks were very evident, catching the light and casting shadow all along the curvature of his darkened cheeks. The skin was rougher here, the duck noticed, though still not as rough as the average human's, and it wondered if this was due to some form of skincare routine or if Sloth was just naturally blessed this way.

But the duck's contemplation was cut short by a colossal sploosh. The rush of water from the resubmersion of Dr. Sloth's legs sucked the duck out from behind him, and before it could even comprehend what was happening, it had crossed over his pelvis and into the danger area. The duck could do nothing to stop itself as it rubbed against the doctor's penis. The rough water only made it worse as the duck's eye grazed the rising beast.

Just as the duck was fearing it would never escape from this torture, it felt Sloth's fingers close around it.

"No no, that's not for duckies," he said with a chuckle as he lifted it clear of the water and popped it on the side of the tub. The duck rejoiced – finally it was free from that cursed monstrosity! However, its elation turned to horror once more as the doctor's hand closed around the giant pickle. Sloth hummed with pleasure as he rubbed his thumb over the wrinkled surface. The sexual organ responded, swelling, arching in the doctor's grasp.

The doctor grinned, and he pulled himself up, supporting his weight on the corner of the bath while he began wanking in earnest. All this was now in full view of the duck, and it was terrified. Gurgles and groans slid out of the doctor's throat as his hand flicked up and down the stiff green shaft. The duck watched as the penis became more and more erect, wishing it could close its eyes, wishing it could turn away. Alas the stiffened rubber remained inanimate and it was forced to watch as Sloth ejaculated all over the far side of the bath tub.

Ted woke up sweating and gasping, shaken to the core by the hellish nightmare ey'd just witnessed. Oh, it had been so real. So vivid. Ted could have sworn ey truly was trapped in the body of that poor duck - that's if ey didn't have the rational mind of a scientist. Ted turned emself over and settled back down, disturbed by the visions ey'd faced. Of course Dr. Sloth was attractive, though not in the conventional sense. But what could have possibly brought on this?


	2. The Naked Truth

*tap, tap, tap*

Ted's fingers ran over the keyboard as ey tried desperately to concentrate on eir work. Last night's nightmare had left em drained and confused, and images and sounds kept resurfacing in the most awkward places.

"What is happening to me?" ey thought desperately, as eir crotch burned at a particularly vivid recollection.

"BOO!"

Ted screamed and bolted. Dr. Sloth looked on puzzled as his minion sped down the hallway towards the bathroom and ran inside. That didn't usually happen when he snuck up on people. He decided to follow the errant employee. He'd see if he couldn't get to the bottom of this.

Ted cowered inside a cubicle, door locked, knees pulled up to eir chest so that no part of em was touching the floor. What was wrong with em? Dr. Sloth was eir Master, eir friend.

The minion's stomach dropped as ey heard the door swing open. Sloth was angry. Ey could tell.

"You had better have a good explanation for abandoning your work post. **Well?**"

His voice reverberated around the bathroom, cutting deep within the minion's soul. Ted couldn't lie to eir master.

"I touched your penis in the bath last night!" Ted cried.

"What?"

"I had a nightmare and I was a rubber duck and I touched your penis and I didn't like it!"

In the cubicle, Ted began to sob.

"I think..." started Sloth, sounding slightly concerned. "We should talk about this in private. Follow me to my office, _**and stop that inane snivelling.**_"

Ted wiped eir face on eir uniform. Ey couldn't let the other workers see ey was upset. No weakness ever went unpunished on the Virtupets Space Station. Ey had to stay cool.

Ted exited the cubicle. Sloth was glaring at em.

"Let's go."

Ted's master turned and marched out of the bathroom, Ted following close behind. Ey put eir business face on and concentrated solely on the back of Sloth's robe. Ey was sure ey would be in big trouble when they reached his office.

Dr. Sloth took his seat behind the plain wooden desk, his chair large and coated in plump black leather cushion. He didn't look happy.

"Sit down and tell me everything that happened. This nightmare was vivid, correct?"

"Yes." Ted looked at eir feet and began to explain. Every so often Sloth would stop em and ask for more detail, so that by the time ey had finished the minion found it difficult to keep from shaking in eir seat.

"And this is where your dream ended?"

"Yes, Master."

"I see. One more question -" Sloth opened a drawer and extracted a small yellow object. He placed it atop the desk precisely half way between himself and his minion. "- Was the duck in your dream similar to this?"

On the table sat a rubber duck that had been modified - given a black cape and a green cap that more accurately reflected Sloth's stylistic preferences.

"I don't know," Ted replied. "I didn't see my reflection."

"I see," said Sloth, stowing the duck back in the drawer. "I have no idea how your consciousness found its way inside my bath buddy, but I can see we are going to have to try and rectify the situation regardless."

His next words came as a shock.

"Stand up and take off your clothes."

The minion's breath caught in eir throat. Had he really just said that? Ey must look so disturbed, but the doctor's expression remained serious. It told em not to question it or there would be trouble.

Standing slowly, ey asked, "Do you mean, all of them?"

"Yes," eir master replied. "I want you completely naked."

"Okay," thought the minion. "I can do this. It's for Master." Suddenly the air had become thinner, and Ted's fingers became sweaty as ey fumbled to undo the buttons on eir work shirt. The shirt came loose, and ey managed to tug it off, letting it crumple on the floor. Surprisingly, there was no reaction from the doctor – no audible gasp, no narrowing of the eyes – watching his minion undress seemed to hardly affect him at all.

He continued that unaffected stare, somewhat worryingly, even as Ted began to remove eir underwear. Ey stopped, looking up at eir master, pleading with him for some form of reassurance.

"Go on," he said calmly. Clearly this wasn't supposed to be an arousing experience. That put Ted's mind at ease somewhat, but it didn't change how awkward ey felt about being naked in front of another person.

Ey continued.

After Ted had discarded the last piece of clothing, Sloth too rose from his seat.

"Now, how are you feeling?" he questioned.

"...Exposed," answered the minion.

"That's as expected. I am now going to take off my clothes so that I am also naked," he continued calmly. "I will make no attempt to touch you or to invade your personal space. You will be able to examine me from a safe distance, and either one of us can call an end to the session. Do you understand?"

"Yes, Master."

In truth, Ted found the situation highly uncomfortable. Once more ey would be forced to behold the pickle peen, and this time every single one of eir reactions would be documented by eir master's penetrating gaze. As Sloth undid the complicated getup holding his robe in place, Ted's dread swelled by increments. Soon they would both be naked, soon nothing would stand guard between em and the pickle peen. He pulled off the robe, exposing his chest. Ted felt a prickling from eir own nipples as ey gazed upon the magnificent sight...

No, ey had to keep eir mind focussed. Ey couldn't show any weakness, even while terrified. Not in front of Sloth.

Having removed all his clothing, Sloth stepped out from behind the desk so as to be in full view. An amused smile crept onto his face as he watched Ted's reaction.

"It doesn't seem so threatening now, does it?" he stated. He was right. Now that Ted was able to look at it freely, ey saw that Sloth's penis was tiny compared to the rest of his body. The velvety cushion it rested against was only moderately larger than a purse.

"No," Ted looked down. "I don't suppose it does." Eir cheeks blushed momentarily as ey thought about how silly ey must seem. At least ey wasn't a biologist – then ey'd have no excuse.

Ey looked up again. Dr. Sloth seemed much more pleased now. Ey breathed a sigh of relief; ey'd passed. After half a minute had passed, a faint draught passed across Ted's exposed skin, prompting the emergence of goose bumps on several locations.

"Can I put my clothes back on now?" ey asked tentatively.

"I want you to do something first," he replied. "Can you turn around for me?"

Ted did as ey was instructed, turning a full three hundred and sixty degrees before facing eir master again. Something about the experience had thrilled em immensely.

"Good. You have my permission to get dressed."

Sloth watched for a moment before he himself started to put his clothes back on. Ted supposed ey should take it as a compliment. Clearly Master cared about eir state of mind, otherwise he would have just sent em back to work without taking the time to try and heal the damage. But how did this even begin in the first place? Who had the power to do such a thing?

When they were both dressed, Sloth sat back down, motioning for Ted to do the same. He leaned forward, clutching his hands together while his elbows rested on the desk. Business mode.

"Now, before you leave, I must ask you = have you made any new enemies recently that I don't already know of?"

Ted thought. Sloth already knew every Grundo that Crazy had annoyed in the past week, and other than that, ey couldn't think of anyone.

"Not that I can say, though any amount of people might object to my blogging style and I wouldn't necessarily know about it."

"I see. If you find any new information, tell me. I take threats to my Space Station's security very seriously." He stood. "Now, if you have nothing more to say to me, I suggest you get back to work. I still expect your task to be completed by the deadline. No extensions, **no exceptions.**"

"Thank you, Master," said Ted, bowing before ey left for eir workstation. Their last little exchange before the end of the naturist session had left em perturbed, but not nearly as much as ey had been that morning. Still, ey wondered why Sloth had wanted to see the view from the back, and why his gaze had lingered while ey was changing back into eir clothes.


	3. xxTease Breakxx

After a long and tiring day, Ted was glad to finally be able to relax. Ey flicked the switch to power on eir personal terminal, remembering how it had felt to stand naked in front of eir master for the first time. A shiver travelled through eir body. In retrospect, it felt empowering. Ey'd seen something that few people had ever seen, probably few people ever would, whether they be Grundo or human or otherwise.

The welcome screen appeared, notifying Ted that ey had no outstanding assignments. Perfect! Time to spy on those strange yet loveable Neopian webloggers who had touched the minion's heart. Ey brought up the webpage. What was this? A message? Ey clicked to open eir inbox. Some anonymous being had decided to link em to a tinychat. The covering note simply said "fulfil your dreams".

It was probably spam, but Ted decided to check it out anyway, lest curiosity gnaw at them for the entire evening:

guest-437097 entered the room (7:25 PM)

**Type /help for a list of commands.**

guest-437097 changed nickname to devotedslothminion (7:25 PM)

devotedslothminion: hello (7:26 PM)

dreammaker: Ah, welcome! I see you received my invitation. (7:26 PM)

devotedslothminion: Who are you? (7:26 PM)

dreammaker: Oh, no one important. (7:27 PM)

dreammaker: Just a simple shipper, one with the means to carry out my fantasies. (7:27 PM)

devotedslothminion: And what is that supposed to mean? (7:29 PM)

dreammaker: Are you sure you don't know? Why don't you mull it over in the bath? ;) (7:30 PM)

devotedslothminion: So, it's you. (7:31 PM)

dreammaker: The penny drops! :) (7:31 PM)

devotedslothminion: Why are you doing this? (7:31 PM)

dreammaker: As I said, I am a simple shipper. (7:32 PM)

dreammaker: It fills me with joy to see lonely people hooking up. (7:32 PM)

devotedslothminion: Whoever you think you are, my personal life is none of your business. (7:33 PM)

devotedslothminion: Back. Off. (7:34 PM)

dreammaker: My, feisty. Aren't we, Mx. Minion? ;) (7:34 PM)

dreammaker: Do not fret, your saviour will be coming soon. (7:34 PM)

dreammaker: 3 (7:34 PM)

dreammaker: 2 (7:35 PM)

devotedslothminion: What are you on about? (7:35 PM)

dreammaker: 1 (7:35 PM)

A notification popped up from Ted's workbin. The timing was uncanny, worrying even! Either this "dreammaker" was psychic or... no, ey didn't want to think about it. Ey clicked the notification to read the mission brief. It was from Dr. Sloth! He needed Ted to... fetch him a creamy hot dog?

devotedslothminion: I'm going. Master needs me. (7:37 PM)

dreammaker: I'll bet he does! ;) (7:38 PM)

devotedslothminion: ...Whatever. Bye. (7:38 PM)

Ted closed the chat. Ey had no idea what to think anymore, so ey focussed on the task at hand – find Master's hot dog and deliver it to him as quickly as possible. It made em sick to eir stomach that someone might be finding some perverse pleasure in all this.

Ted placed eir identity card in the electronic slot.

"Delivery for Dr. Sloth," ey said when the red LED lighted.

"Enter," said a familiar voice, and the LED turned green. Ted removed eir card and the door shot open, allowing em to step into the room before it crashed back down behind em.

Dr. Sloth was sitting in a chaise longue decorated in the same plump leather that had coated his business chair. He motioned for em to sit down on an armchair of similar design. Between them lay an ornate coffee table the same length as the sofa, two cups of tea perched on top. Ted caught a faint whiff of melon from the glowing steam as ey sat down.

"Here's your hot dog."

Ted slid the cardboard packaging across the table. Sloth smiled. It felt good having a dependable minion who could bring him snacks whenever he wanted.

"Have a drink," he said in response. Ted obeyed, picking up the nearest cup and giving it a blow. The steam swirled above the lurid liquid, and Ted pondered the possible origin of this exceptional green glow. Unfortunately, ey wasn't a biologist so ey didn't have the foggiest.

Meanwhile, Sloth removed the plastic covering from his hot dog, letting the condensation run back onto the sausage so it didn't disturb his bun. He lifted it up to his face, breathing in the meaty vapours. Yes, this was a good hot dog. Placing it back on the table, he slid the topmost sausage from its sticky perch and presented the floppy thing towards Ted.

"Would you like a sausage?" he said, his voice deep and warm. His eyes were friendly, his mouth curving gently upward in that amused smile he used when socialising with the people below him.

Ted tried not to laugh, whether from entertainment or from awkwardness. Ey took a quick sip of eir tea to help calm themselves.

"Um, no thanks. I'm not too keen on mayonnaise... or meat. Thank you, Master."

"I see," he said. "All the more for me then."

Ted had to try not to spit out eir tea as Sloth tipped his head back and lowered the hot dog into his mouth. His lips closed around the sausage as he licked at the mayo dressing, audibly voicing his approval at the workmanship of the piece. He licked and sucked until every last bit of white had disappeared, and only then did he begin to chew his sausage, which disappeared rather quickly all in all.

What a strange way to eat a sausage.

"Good work, minion!" he stated before continuing with his meal. Thankfully he was taking a more traditional route with this next half, picking up the bun and biting into the sausage like a normal human being would. Ted simply sipped eir tea, smiling at eir master. He really was a character!

Several bites into the hot dog, Sloth continued the conversation.

"Now, I did call you here for a reason." Wow. Ted had been beginning to wonder. "I have been thinking about this security breach, and it is important that we know as much as we can about the enchantment that was placed on you. With that in mind, I would like to ask for your cooperation in some experiments to ascertain the nature of the magic at work."

"Yes, of course!" Ted replied. Anything for Master, and anything to get rid of this stupid hex. "In fact, I was contacted earlier by someone claiming to be responsible for it."

Sloth loomed closer, eyes widening.

"What did you glean from them?"

Ted shook eir head.

"Not much. They knew enough to hide their location, and they seemed more interested in taunting me than anything else."

"I see." Sloth's face hardened, and he retreated. He took his penultimate bite, seemingly mulling things over while he chewed.

"I'm guessing they are familiar with Tumblr, since they contacted me through my blog and described themselves as a "shipper" while we were talking," Ted continued. "They also used the IM client Tinychat, which suggests a knowledge of the Tumblr community's traditional preferences. I don't know of anyone actually _on_ the neotag who could have done this though."

"So, you believe it was an outsider?" he said over the rim of his teacup.

"My guess, from the way they were speaking, is that they are someone who has been reading my blog for some time, not necessarily following it from a registered account, but checking up on it every so often to see how I'm doing. It's not likely to be someone who knows a lot of Sloth minions, since they implied that they wanted you and I to be in a relationship that extends past the simpler boundaries of boss vs. employee."

Ted tried not to blush. Even if ey did, though, ey wouldn't try to hide it. The prospect was obviously a slim one, and eir loyalty to Sloth wasn't based on how much affection ey received from him. The fact that Ted found the thought of it somewhat exciting was no threat to their current relationship. Obviously.

"In that case, I think it best that we press on. It is imperative that we deal with this issue swiftly, before it has a chance to threaten the company. You will return here at nine o'clock. This will give me enough time to prepare the experiment, and settle some other matters beforehand."

He tossed the last of the hot dog in his mouth and licked the sticky white drips from his hands.

"Deal?"

"Deal," Ted confirmed.

"Now get out. I have some private business to attend to," Sloth said, smiling.

Ted did as ey was told.

"Thank you for the tea," ey said as ey exited the room. So much to think about. At least ey'd be getting to spend some more quality time with eir master.


	4. Ted Gets Wet

"Enter."

The room itself had barely changed. Sloth, on the other hand...

Ted almost didn't recognise him without that magnificent opera collar. Instead, he was wearing nothing but a fluffy fuchsia bathrobe, embroidered with the letters "F.S." in startling green. It was certainly not what ey had expected. Furthermore, he was beaming in that way that tells you he has something exciting up his sleeve that you're not necessarily going to enjoy. Ever so suddenly, Ted began to feel nervous. What kind of "experiment" did Sloth really have in mind?

"_Mmm, what a hottie,"_ said a voice in Ted's head.

"What!?" Ted said aloud.

The doctor's smile broadened.

"You needn't look so surprised," he chuckled as he stood and smoothed himself down. "After all, there's nothing under here that you haven't seen before."

Ted hung eir head.

"That's true, that's very true. I'm sorry Master. I think it's just I haven't ever seen you in anything other than your work robes."

Where had that voice come from? It wasn't eir own thoughts, surely. Hopefully it was just a fluke and it wouldn't happen again. This situation was worrying enough without having a possible brain meltdown on eir hands. Anyway, must concentrate. Must not show fear.

Sloth laughed and looped his arm around the seriously confused minion. Thank goodness he was in a good mood.

"Now, let's get on, shall we?"

He guided Ted toward a small alcove in one of the corners of the room. The alcove contained a door that was hidden from most of the room, and they passed through it into a narrow but beautifully decorated corridor. Ted thought ey detected a hint of humidity in the air, which was confirmed when they turned into a bathroom.

He had to be joking.

In the middle of the floor lay the same bathtub that Ted had been trapped inside the night before. Perched on the side of the tub, a little yellow ducky in a black and red cloak stared at them in anticipation.

"Master, why have you brought me here?" ey asked.

"Ah, now, I think you'll agree that before we go stumbling blindly in, trying to work out what sort of magic is involved, we need to determine whether or not the enchantment is still in place, and if so, what triggers it. Don't you agree?"

"Yes, Master." Ey couldn't argue with that logic. Still, the idea of watching Dr. Sloth take yet another bath didn't exactly fill em with joy.

The still fuchsia-clad doctor strolled over to the edge of the bath, dipping his hand in to test the water.

"Ah, perfect," he whispered. He determined to congratulate his Grundo helpers later for their excellent timing. He whipped back round to face Ted. "Are you going to take your clothes off or do you need me to assist you?"

What?

"You mean... I'm going in there with you?" Oh great.

"Of course!" Sloth smirked. "Am I really that large that you think I need two towels to dry myself?"

Ah, stupid! Of course. Two towels. One at each end of the bath. Ted saw it now. Ey'd been too busy trying not to panic to notice the small details. Speaking of details, why was there a smell of pasta around?

Ey began to undo eir shirt, but eir hands were unsteady and the humidity made the buttons slippery. Ted managed one before heat and frustration started to get the better of em. The second was about as much as ey could take.

"I think I need some help," ey admitted. Again Sloth smirked, but he came to Ted's rescue.

"Oh, what am I to do with you?" he asked playfully as one by one the button holes came loose. "There you are," he said, as he gently slid the shirt back to expose his minion's shoulders.

Ted had to suppress a nervous smile as ey tugged eir arms out from inside those long sleeves. Ey wasn't used to such prolonged and intimate closeness. The shirt dropped to the floor with a "flump", and Sloth started to work at the minion's trousers. Ted simply examined the top of his forehead, until after a smooth tug upwards, the trousers also fell. The doctor had just slid a hand under eir bra strap when Ted interrupted.

"I think," ey stammered. "I can take it from here. Thank you for helping me Master." Ey was now very aroused, and ey didn't like it.

"As you wish." Sloth chuckled and gave Ted's hair a ruffle before he sauntered off to cater to his own arrangements. Ted began to remove eir bra, no longer convinced that Sloth's intentions were 100% scientific.

This whole thing made absolutely no sense!

"_It makes perfect sense to me,"_ said the voice from earlier.

"_Oh, go away,"_ Ted replied. Out of the corner of eir eye, ey saw Sloth remove his bathrobe. It couldn't be. Was that thing _larger?_

"_That's no way to speak to your subconscious!"_

"_You are not my subconscious. Go away, I'm busy."_

This was the last thing ey needed.

"_Busy relaxing in a nice warm bath – isn't it nice having time alone with your thoughts? But then, you're not alone, are you Teddy?"_

Ey glanced over to Sloth, who was in the process of hanging his bathrobe on a nearby wall hook. Yes, it had definitely grown since this morning.

"_What do you want? Or are you just here to gloat?"_ Ted shot at the voice.

"_Oh no no no, how could you think such a thing? I'm only here to make sure you're having a _good time_."_

"_A good time!? I think you're the only one here who's having a good time."_

"_I disagree," _the voice shot back._ "Considering how much he's grown..."_

"_No!"_

The voice laughed. It continued to laugh while Ted removed eir socks and pants.

"_Would you shut up!"_ ey snapped, and the laughter died away.

"Are you ready?" asked the doctor.

"_Yes! Their body is ready!"_

Ted ignored the voice and gave him an affirmative nod. It would be difficult not to show how scared ey was, especially with that meddling voice distracting em all the time.

As if sensing Ted's trepidation, Sloth approached and put an arm around eir shoulders, hugging em close. Eir eyes wandered over to his pickle penis – ey needed to force emself to accept that it would be sharing the bath with em.

Ey reached up with eir hand, looking for eir master's, seeking that tiny bit of extra comfort as ey led him towards the bath. Dr. Sloth unwound Ted's arm from around eir body, allowing em to use him for balance as ey stepped into the steaming water. Ted let out a short gasp as the temperature cut into eir feet.

"Oosh, it's hot," ey said, before realising that ey probably should have phrased that differently. Ey crouched down as the doctor stepped into the bath. The water lapped at eir sensitive bits, causing a very strange sensation. Ey sat down quickly to avoid further stimulation. The doctor also lowered himself into the water, and Ted drew eir knees up to allow him some more room in the cramped tub.

Besides, ey didn't want to accidentally touch his genitalia again – not after what happened the last time.

"_Are you having fun yet?" _asked the voice.

"_No."_

"_Aw, that's too bad. Maybe you should do more to entice him. Call him Master. Say you _need_ him."_

"_Get lost."_

"_Can you tell me something? Is it floating?"_

"_Is what floating?"_

"_You know, his ding dong. His dickie bird. His greenis."_

"_Greenis!?"_

"_Well, most penises aren't green, dear."_

"_You have to be kidding!"_

"_No no, it's true! I promise!"_

"Well?" interrupted the doctor. "How are you feeling?"

Ted looked up - ey'd been staring at his chest the whole time!

"Nervous," ey ventured.

Sloth nodded.

"But you're not feeling tired or faint?"

"No, Master."

"Good!"

He smiled, possibly to reassure em. Ted did not feel reassured. Eir eyes flicked over to the rubber duck. It was still perched on the side of the bath, eyeing both of them with equal intensity. Ted couldn't decide whether it looked more like excitement or fear.

"Does duckie have to watch?" ey asked nervously. Sloth looked displeased.

"The duck's presence here forms a vital part of my investigative process," he sighed. "But I suppose we can move on to the next phase of the experiment."

Reaching over, he plucked the duck from its perch and let it land in the water. Ted retreated instinctively. Ey couldn't shake the feeling that there might be another minion in there, trapped as ey had been the night before.

"So, no sudden tiredness or dizziness, I take it?" His eyes bored into em. He already knew the answer. Somehow Ted seemed even more naked now.

"No."

"No nausea?"

"No." No nausea, just a sense of bewilderment and dread. The little duck floated between them, though it wasn't the only thing floating in the bath. Ted's legs were beginning to cramp, but ey didn't want to disturb the water. Ey didn't know what would be worse – giving the duck a full view of eir body, or sending it off towards the floating pickle.

"Well then," Dr. Sloth concluded. "I see no reason to continue allowing him to infringe upon our privacy."

He gave Ted a wink as he removed the duck from the bathtub.

"_Is this it?" _Ted thought hopefully. _"Is this the end of the experiment? Can I get out of the bath?"_

"_I wouldn't bet on it,"_ answered the voice.

"_Who asked you?"_

"_Why, you did! Besides, I'm just here to give you some friendly advice."_

"_Friendly advice?" _Oh no.

"_Don't try to leave before he wants you to. Who knows what might be going on in that funny head of his?"_

"_You're the telepath," _Ted retorted. _"You tell me."_

The voice was right, though. Sloth was unpredictable – it was part of what made him so enticing. You could never know exactly what he was thinking at any given time. Right now, though, Ted had the awful feeling that ey would be getting a lot more acquainted with a certain pickle peen before the night was through.


	5. Eat Your Greens!

Ted's stomach grumbled.

"_Sounds like you need something to _eat_,"_ laughed the voice in eir head.

"_What's that even supposed to mean!?"_

"_Poor little minion, hungry for their master's body."_

"_Cut it out!"_ Ted snapped at them."_If you're here to help then why don't you give me some _useful_ advice, like how to get out of this bath without offending Dr. Sloth!"_

"_Maybe if you ask him nicely, let him fondle your –"_

"Master!" Ey'd probably spoken too loud, but Ted did not want to hear another word from that wicked voice. Sloth fixed em with a questioning stare. "I'm feeling rather... hungry, and I'm wondering if –"

"Ah!" Sloth's face brightened into a smug grin. "When you refused my sausage earlier, I knew it was only a matter of time, so I prepared."

He reached over the side of the bath, and Ted wondered what in Neopia he could be hiding down there. The bathwater sloshed from end to end, and Ted was very glad that the duck had already been removed. Ey heard the scrape of a plate on the tiles, and Sloth reappeared holding a long green vegetable. Great. There went Ted's plan of disappearing to get a snack and hopefully catch eir breath again for a few minutes.

"Or rather," Sloth continued. "I had Gargarox prepare. I believe this will be more to your liking."

Ted took the vegetable. Upon closer inspection, it was the smell of this courgette that ey had mistaken for pasta while they were undressing. The smooth skin was warm to the touch, a whiff of cheese and garlic mixed in with the subtle scent of the vegetable itself. Oh, its flesh looked gorgeous.

Ted was no longer focussing on eir surroundings. All that mattered was this courgette. Ey bit into its succulent flesh, humming with pleasure as the juices swirled around on eir tongue. Ey chewed the moist pulp, savouring every tiny bit of flavour before ey finally swallowed.

Gargarox was truly a master chef.

At the other end of the bath, Dr. Sloth looked pleased. Too pleased. Ted wouldn't even have noticed, except that the doctor's chest was expanding further and his breathing was slowly increasing in volume. Ted stopped eating, unsure of whether ey should check if eir master was all right.

"Continue," he gurgled breathily. His voice was shallow but compelling. The combination was dangerous.

Ted resumed nibbling at the baked courgette, now genuinely worried. Had ey done something wrong? Was Master in some sort of pain?

"_Confused, are we?"_ the voice mocked.

"_I don't need your help. I just want to know if Master's okay."_

"_I'd say he's more than okay, considering you're snacking on his greenis."_

Ted looked at the courgette – dark green skin, pale green flesh, golden herby breadcrumb filling...

"_It looks nothing like a greenis!"_

"_Oh, I beg to differ!"_

Ted glanced at the doctor's crotch – just to reaffirm eir own position – and nearly winced. It was swollen and dark, peeping just slightly higher out of the water than it had been before.

"Why_ did you have to bring that up?"_

"_Really _you're_ the one who brought it up. You're not underestimating how _desirable_ a body like yours can be, are you?"_

Ted felt sick. Ey wasn't a sexual person. Ey hadn't asked to be gifted with such an appealing physique. If it really was true, though... ey couldn't say no to eir Master. Ey would do anything for him, even if it meant going against eir natural programming. The air felt so much hotter all of a sudden, so much more humid. Ey decided to focus on the courgette and try not to think about its resemblance to Sloth's growing erection.

The workmanship was so perfect, it was hard to keep silent through the bursts of flavour. Every now and then a small moan would still slip out though, and the doctor's breathing would spike in response. But ey mustn't think about that. Just concentrate on how it tastes, how it feels inside em. Forget all about Sloth's arousal and just enjoy eir meal.

"_Ooh, if I were him right now I'd be touching myself!"_

"_Would you please shut up?"_

"_I'm just trying to point out that he's showing _remarkable_ self-control. I really don't see why you should be worrying so much."_

Perhaps the voice was right. Ey did trust eir master to know eir limits, and he had never once asked Ted to do anything that ey couldn't cope with.

"_How do I know you haven't bewitched him into lusting over me?"_

"_Oh, my dear, poor, sweet minion," _the voice answered condescendingly. _"I have the ability to communicate over long distances, but no magic known to Neopet or Faerie can change someone's mind. Face it – he _wants_ you. I bet he's _always_ wanted you. All I did was put a match to the tinder."_

It... it couldn't be true. Could it?

"_And don't try and tell me that somewhere, buried in the darkest depths of your soul, a little part of you didn't want him too."_

Of course ey loved eir Master. Who couldn't love a man like Dr. Sloth? Strong and intellectual, mysterious, yet engaging. He was the perfect master, and yes, Ted had often wished that ey could spend more time in his presence. This level of intimacy, however? Pah, Sloth had thousands of followers! A fair few would probably scramble all over each other for a chance to touch his penis. Was that it, perhaps? Was it Ted's lack of enthusiasm for all things sexual that made em a desirable partner?

Just thinking about that paradox made em dizzy. To make matters worse, ey was running out of courgette. Across the tub, Sloth licked his lips. It wouldn't be long now. Ted's pulse started to increase – each bite ey took brought em closer to the mighty pickle. It was hot, so hot, hard to breathe properly. As a drip of sweat trickled down eir back, the final piece of courgette entered eir mouth. Ted chewed it gingerly as ey studied eir master's condition. Apart from the obvious erection in his genital area, his nipples had grown darker, as well as some of the area around his jaw. His eyes, on the other hand, were bright and hungry. Ravenous pupils roamed restlessly over eir body, almost expectantly.

Ted gulped, inadvertently swallowing the last of the expertly cooked vegetable. Now there were no excuses, no more diversions. Pleasing eir master was what ey lived for. Ey only wished ey'd had more time to mentally prepare.

"You polished that off rather quickly, didn't you?" observed Dr. Sloth as Ted washed the few greasy crumbs from around eir mouth. His voice deepened, his face tightening into a particularly malicious grin. "Simply watching you would be enough to make anyone... _hungry_."

Ted's chest swelled and purged as ey tried to intake enough oxygen to think clearly. This wasn't going to be easy.

"What would you have me do..." ey started hesitantly, eyeing him questioningly. "...to satisfy you, Master?"

He inhaled sharply and leant forward, evidently pleased.

"I want you," he said with a smirk. "To moan like that, with me in your mouth instead of Gargarox's cooking. Do you think you can do that for me?"

He studied the minion's face. Ted could see that hint of malicious glee in his eyes. He had known what the answer would be before he even asked the question.

"Of c-course, Master," ey stammered. "It is my pleasure to serve you."

"_Help!" _ey thought desperately. _"What do I do?"_

"_Oh, you really are hopeless!" _the voice piped up. For once, Ted wasn't entirely ungrateful. _"Right, number one, keep smiling so he knows you're at least making an effort to enjoy it. Next, I suppose you won't want to drown, so you'll mostly be working on the head while you keep the rest of him stimulated with your hand."_

The... rest of him? Ey hadn't realised that oral sex could be so complicated.

"_Since you're a newbie,"_ the voice continued. _"I suggest you keep to licking for a while before you try to put the whole thing in your mouth, otherwise you'll get tired and won't be able to finish him off."_

"_How long is this going to take?"_

The voice laughed.

"_It shouldn't be too long, seeing as he's so happy already, but trust me, your jaw will thank me for telling you not to suck."_


	6. Climax

Sloth had been watching as Ted stared nervously at his erect monument. He leant back against the wall of the bath, sliding down until his arms lay comfortably, supporting him from opposite sides of the tub. Ted fought eir natural urges as the greenis slid closer, master's legs restricting em on either side.

"Come to me, minion," he ordered. "Make me come for you."

This was it. Ted crawled forward in what ey hoped was a seductive manner. Reaching the top of the doctor's legs, ey lifted a hand slowly out of the water, trailing it lightly across the joint between his crotch and thigh before ey settled down on the other side, arm hugging his hip for balance. The act seemed to please him, as his breathing hitched for a moment, a colourless fluid seeping from his urethra.

Okay, so far so good. Now would come the tricky part, as the head of Sloth's penis cleared the water by barely an inch. Ted took a few deep breaths before ey grabbed the base with eir free hand, raising the penis up out of the water to give em more to work with. The telepath was right – ey didn't want to drown. Ey placed eir tongue against the ridge that ran vertically from head to base, pressing against its contours, and dragged it upwards slowly and deliberately so as to run over every last little bump.

"Mnnfh," was the doctor's response.

This encouraged Ted enough to continue. Ey swirled eir tongue around on his shaft, stroking the submerged section with eir thumb as ey'd seen him do while pleasuring himself the previous night. His sighs and gasps only spurred the minion on. It was almost fun, in a way. Sloth seemed to be enjoying it, and it didn't feel at all as disgusting as Ted had feared. It just felt like a giant thumb, really. A giant, soapy tasting thumb. If only the situation weren't completely and totally awkward it would be fine.

Ey looked up at eir master and smiled coyly before continuing. Ey was more exploratory this time, licking around the seam between the head and body in a sinusoidal pattern, since that was the area ey seemed to get the most positive feedback from. Ey would also let out a small moan now and then, which Sloth would invariably echo. Ted knew, however, that he wouldn't be satisfied until his greenis was in eir mouth.

But ey wasn't ready for that yet.

Ey began massaging the base of the doctor's penis with eir fingers as well as eir thumb. This however meant the phallus was no longer as stable, so eir lips were drafted in to help, teasing a few extra gurgles from the man's throat.

"_Not too shabby," _the voice decided to comment._"Considering you're a newbie."_

Ted ignored it. Ey needed to focus on pleasing Dr. Sloth.

Ey stiffened as something crept up eir neck. It was Sloth's hand, his fingers running back and forwards through eir hair as he continued to moan. In the heat of the moment, Ted decided to go for it, sliding eir moist lips over the tip of his penis. Sloth moaned, and Ted moaned too. It was so big inside eir mouth! Soapy liquid dribbled onto eir tongue, and ey realised it must be alkaline. That made sense to em. Ey wondered if Sloth's species reproduced in much the same way humans did. Ey wasn't an anthropologist though, so ey couldn't go around making assumptions.

Ey closed eir lips around his soft green flesh, stroking his head with the back of eir tongue as he continued to stroke eirs. Ey closed eir eyes, just for a moment, and let out a moan – eir first real moan of the night. Ey felt Sloth's grip on eir hair tighten, and when ey opened eir eyes, he was staring at em, imploring em.

"Please," he struggled, breathless. "Please my balls."

Ted's arm was beginning to ache, but ey did as ey was told. Ey loosened eir grip on the base of the penis, sliding further down with eir mouth to make sure ey didn't lose control of it. Eir fingers slid down, feeling their way towards his bloated testicles. Unsure of quite what to do, ey found the nearest one and took it in eir palm, rubbing it gently with eir thumb.

"_No no no," _interrupted the voice. _"You're doing it all wrong! You need to concentrate on his scrotum. Try rubbing it between your thumb and fingers."_

Ted moved eir thumb along until it found the optimal spot, a throaty groan greeting em as ey rolled the folds of skin around with eir fingers.

"_That's more like it. Good buddy!"_

Ted grunted. Ey already had a dick in eir mouth – ey didn't need to be patronised further.

Ey now concentrated on getting eir tongue deeper – ey could no longer see eir master's face, but from the sounds he was making it seemed like ey was still doing good. Bathwater wasn't the nicest taste in the world, but ey didn't care by this point. Ey just wanted him to climax so ey could tend to eir aching jaw. Nose touched the water as eir tongue slid out, writhing against his wrinkled surface while ey maintained a steady oscillating pressure with the rest of eir mouth.

Ey moaned, the greenis throbbing against eir lips and tongue. Ey had to keep going.

Experimenting, ey pulled lightly on the doctor's scrotum to see his response.

"Aaaaaaaaaaaaah," he moaned, clutching Ted's hair tightly once more and almost forcing em underwater. Clearly not a tactic to be trifled with then.

Ey incorporated the downward stroking into his scrotal massage, giving it a small tug now and then just to keep him on his toes. Ey also started drawing little circles, just above his hip, with eir non-dominant hand – initially an attempt to stave off cramp, but he seemed to enjoy it so ey carried on. The moans were definitely coming quicker now, but ey wasn't sure if there was anything more ey could do to further him on.

"_He's nearly there, little one. Try stroking his perineum."_

"_His what?"_

"_The bit behind his balls."_

Ey would have known that if ey had been a biologist.

"_You mean like this?"_

"Yes!" Sloth unwittingly answered as ey ran eir finger down the patch of skin.

"_Exactly."_

Ted closed eir eyes and moaned as ey explored the new territory, wishing the ending would come soon. Ey was beginning to run out of steam, and ey didn't want to have to face the wrath of a sexually frustrated Dr. Sloth. Ey could feel him throbbing, feel him tense up as ey stimulated the muscles between his smooth green thighs.

Suddenly something changed. Sloth's hand no longer stroked, but clutched tightly to the minion's shoulder.

"_He's about to cum – get ready to swallow."_

"_What-"_

The thought was cut off as warm, thick, sweet and salty liquid filled eir mouth, accompanied by an enormous grunt from the doctor. Ey swallowed quickly to get rid of it, feeling like someone had just spat a huge glob of phlegm inside em. Ted pulled away, letting the penis drop back into the water with a little splosh.

The doctor's hand slipped from eir shoulder as ey retreated. His chest was heaving, head back, panting. Ey massaged eir arms, moving eir jaw back and forth to make sure it still functioned correctly. Neither of them seemed any the worse for wear, though Sloth looked pretty wiped out. He rubbed his face with his hand, then inexplicably started to laugh. Ted couldn't help but smile. Ey'd made him happy, and that was what counted most.

"Oh, devoted one," he said, leaning forward and gazing into eir eyes. Ted had never seen him so content! "You did well."

He took the minion's hand, rubbing it gently in his own. Ted's heart felt warmer than ey'd ever felt it. Those sharp red eyes just seemed to swallow everything – even the nausea.

"Thank you, Master," ey replied, eyes flicking downwards. "I am honoured by your praise."

He moved closer, keeping hold of Ted's hand with one hand and leaning on the wall beside em with the other. It felt intimate in a way ey'd never experienced before.

"I know," he spoke softly. "That must have been difficult for you. I appreciate your loyalty, I do. In fact, I would like to give you a special reward for your services."

He lifted Ted's hand to his lips and kissed it softly, watching the redness seep into eir cheeks. Surely this was another dream – another trick by the telepath to get em flustered. But no, these sensations! He progressed slowly up eir arm, and it was a struggle for Ted to keep eir breathing even. He paused at the crook of eir hairy man pit, blowing ever so gently over the deep crevice. The tickling of eir armpit caused a very definite shiver to run through Ted's body. Sloth grinned as ey tried to keep silent, then took em completely by surprise with a stealth kiss, planting his lips on eirs. Ted moaned with surprise, and then with pleasure as their tongues met and ey melted into eir master's grasp.

After a moment that felt like forever, Sloth pulled out. Ted stared at him in confusion. Had ey done the wrong thing? No, he was grinning in that same impish manner as before.

"I'm going to touch you until you climax," he explained in a throaty rumble. "How do you feel about that?"

"Master, I –" Ey had so many conflicting emotions. It wasn't a simple case of pleasing him, that ey could place all eir emotions aside through that one justification. Ey was scared, of course. But eir heart wasn't the only thing that was pounding. Ey couldn't fight it anymore. "I... want you to touch me."

Sloth's smile twisted, and Ted gasped as his hand brushed the inside of eir thigh.

"Is that your final answer?" No hint of surprise in his eyes. He was giving em a chance to retract eir statement, but it was unlikely ey would.

"Please Master," ey panted. "I want to be yours. I want you to touch me."

He slid back into the minion's mouth, hooking his left arm behind eir head for support as he started massaging eir textured buttock. Ted shoved all morality temporarily aside – it just felt so perfect to be pleasured by eir master in such an intimate way.

As Ted moaned into him, Dr. Sloth's hand wandered up to the joint of eir pelvis – tickling it so as eir spinal reflex thrust em still further into his warm caress – then down towards eir pubic area, kissing eir neck as he stroked the long, twisted hairs. Ted gasped for air as eir nerve endings started shooting off in all directions. Sloth clearly knew his way around the human body, and he was showing no mercy.

But more was to come as his fingers slid inside eir vulva. Ted cried out at the sudden stimulation of eir clitoris. It was almost too much to bear as he worked deeper, fingertips sliding over eir mucous coated ridges, until Ted was sure ey could get no wetter.

"I didn't want you for your body," he whispered in eir ear. Ted couldn't speak over eir struggle to control the rising hysteria. Sloth's words washed over em like soapy suds, and ey couldn't brush them away. "But you have made yourself irresistible to me. Mind and body, you are all mine."

What in Neopia was he on about?

Ted's thoughts stopped in their tracks as Sloth's mouth closed around eir nipple. His tongue brushed at the sensitive teat as he continued to explore inside eir flooded basement. Ey couldn't hold it in any longer – ey clutched at the sides of the bath in vain, groaning as the skilled doctor guided em closer and closer to climax.

"Master, I, I," ey yelled. Sloth bit eir nipple. "Yahhhhhhh..."

Some sort of nervous explosion sent shockwaves through Ted's body, but Sloth was ruthless. He kept stroking eir soft bits gently, trapping those feelings inside until they had well and truly dissipated.

Ted whimpered weakly, gazing into the knowing eyes of eir master. Ey'd done it. Ey'd survived. Was he pleased? Oh Fyora, let him be pleased.

Sloth's fingers departed from the sunken cave. Ted's vagina felt so empty without them, but then a warm soggy hand squeezed eir thigh comfortingly. Sloth was smiling. Ted smiled back, yet was ambushed by another kiss. One hand caressing eir thigh, another cradling eir skull, Ted felt so wonderfully safe in his grasp. Without thinking, ey placed eir own hands around him, hugging him as close as eir weakened arms could bear. It was bliss.

Slowly, Sloth released em from the kiss. He stroked eir cheek fondly with his dry hand, smiling like a gardener whose anemones were finally in bloom.

"You will do well, minion," he purred softly. "I should never have doubted you would."

As he stood, water cascading down his majestic body, Ted thought to emself – perhaps serving as Dr. Sloth's personal bath buddy wouldn't be such a bad thing after all.


End file.
